When I first started working at AC, I knew most of my coworkers by name. But when the senior guys would ask me to fetch someone, They’d call them by their nicknames, and I’d be in a daze. I was a rookie, there was no way I’d call them by their nickname, But at AC, it seemed everyone had one.
There were too many to remember, a list that never ended, Like Cousin It, Pipes, and Got a Minute. There was Fuck Fuck, Garden Gnome, and Hook Me Up, Annoying Man, Spiney Norman, and Badger Breath. There was Spider, Fossil, Stoney, and Hippie, Slab, Eddie the Eagle, Eddie Munster, and Praymantis. There was Stu Cazzo, Brave Heart, Single Cell, and Piglet, Waterboy, Elmer Fudd, Short Bus, and Extra Section. There was Cow Pie, Krusty, Vinyl Sofa, and Drywall, Queen Bee, Betty Boop, Jumbo Joe, and Barney Rubble. There was Rodney Dangerfield, Nomine, Chammer, and Texaco, The Hook, Stone in Shoe, Big Back, and Pinky. There was Laser, Opie Bumfuck, Timberdick, and Bags, 3D Waffle, Airport Hobo, Billy Liar, and Buffalo Head. There was Nearly Normal, Alphabet, My Dad, and Sugar, Pik a Topic, Rattler, Big Head, and Ice Man. There was Face, Willy Wing Nut, Turbine, and Wee Man, Cave Man, Bumber Head, Jaws, and Fark Pooks. There was Vice Grips, The Nob, The Newf, and Bam Bam, Uzi, Powboy, Mississauga Rattler, and Legend. There was Seal Pup, Tricky Dicky, Two Tone, and Skid Row, Heavy Duty, and the list went on and on, too many to mention. The real names shall remain secret, out of respect for the individuals.
